10 Things to Smile About: January

1.  A start to a new year. Fresh starts always feel great.

2.  Continuing our Journey Toward Financial Freedom by paying off over $1,000 of debt in January!

3.  A little more down time than usual with Daddy... and helping him nap.

4.  Finally joining Twitter!  Follow me @ATroopsGirl.

5.  Celebrating Grace's 100th day of Kindergarten by counting (& eating) 100 Skittles.

6.  Discovering and falling in love with Army Wives... oh, the tears I've shed in January!

7.  Finding skinny jeans.

8.  Lots and lots of pj days.  I love pj days!

9.  Finally getting some peace about big decisions for our family.

10.  Shopping with the girls.

Retailers Cheapen Tomorrow's Meaning

I'm not going to rant tomorrow on Veteran's Day - so I'll do it today instead.

I know I'm a bit biased, being a wife of a veteran...  But I HATE Veteran's Day sales and advertising.  Seriously, I have to change the channel every time a Macy's Veteran's Day sale pops on TV flashing images of shoes, jewelry and coats with the U.S. flag streaming in the background.  A few years back I was shopping at Macy's on Veteran's Day and asked the lady who checked me out if they offered a Veteran's discount.  She looked at me like I had just asked her if they sold llamas or something.  Like it would be so absurd to assume with all the red, white and blue balloons and streamers all over the store, that they were actually acknowledging that Veteran's Day meant something more to them than a discount and their bottom line.

Joel and I never expect to get any advantages because of his military status and his deployment history.  His service is just that, a service.  I love that some companies like Disney and Applebees, honor veterans and their families with a free meal or discounts on vacation packages.  I think that's really thoughtful and even though we've never taken advantage of those offers, I respect those companies for reaching out to those who've served in a tangible way.

I wrote Macy's and told them what I thought about their advertising.  I didn't get a response and I didn't expect one.  But tomorrow, on Veteran's Day, I will write them again and next  year, I'll do the same. 

MilSpouse Friday Fill-In

Hope you all had a good week!  Join in on the Friday fun at Wife of a Sailor.

1.What’s the nicest thing a stranger has ever done for you?
When I was a Junior at college, another student and I were chosen to receive a scholarship by an older couple.  At the scholarship awards banquet, we had the opportunity to briefly get to know them over lunch and I was really humbled that this couple, who didn't know me, would be so generous to help me with some of the cost of my college education.  That scholarship took effect my Senior year, and I remember when I was working on projects or studying for a test, that couple would come to mind, and I was reminded to work especially hard in order to respect their generosity.

2.If you are having a hard time going to sleep, what do you do to help yourself?
This is very timely, because the last few weeks have been terrible for me come bedtime.  Lately I've been going for the bottle of Benadryl.
3.Name something that makes you wish you were a kid again.
I really miss the vacations we had as kids... it was wonderful to not have to do my laundry, pack, plan, pay or have to drive. 

4.What is something you never believed until you experienced it?
I never understood that unimaginable love that you can have for your child.  I remember how I instantly fell in love when we heard Grace's heartbeat for the first time.  We're blessed to have two such beautiful souls in our life and I never could have imagined that I would love two people who are so much work, so much.

5.What can’t you say “no” to?
If Grace asks me to go to the mall, I can't say no.  Why would I?

30 Days

Today marks 30 days since Joel left.  I woke up feeling blah.  Grace came in my room to wake me up and by some sort of miracle, I convinced her to crawl in bed with me and read books.  So, she "read" a stack of books while I slept for a bit longer.  Right now I'm counting down the hours until I can crawl back into bed.

This past week, my best friend from college was here for a visit.  We went to a museum, the zoo, did lots of shopping, went on walks, played with the kids, drank gallons of coffee together, talked and laughed until we cried.  It was a perfect visit.  It's a blessing to have friends who you can be 100% honest with and 100% yourself with.  There are no walls and no masks.  Just complete honesty.  The ways friendships should be.

She left yesterday and my in-house grown-up companion was gone.  I realized how distracted I was when she was here.  I didn't constantly worry about Joel.  I wasn't anxious at night about being the only adult in the house.  I felt like me.  But now the worry and anxiety are back and I'm, well, lonely.

I shouldn't be ashamed to say I'm lonely.  I don't think it would surprise anyone to think that months and months without your spouse, would leave you feeling lonely.  But, there's something about saying it - admitting it to the world.  So there it is - I'M LONELY.  I want someone to do life with.  I want someone to cook for who appreciates it.  I want someone to talk politics and theology with.  I want someone to sit next to me while I read.  I want someone here to help with baths and help pick up toys.  I want someone to play with my kids, so I can sit for 10 minutes without interruption.  I want Joel here.

Hoping tomorrow will be a better day.

Joel - wherever you are today, I love you.

The Replacement Baby

This picture was taken just moments after Grace was reunited with her beloved Soft Baby... well, Soft Baby's "sister".

Just a few weeks ago, I took the girls to the mall while Joel was out of town. Both Joel and I had made a rule a few weeks back that Grace wasn't allowed to bring any toys or her purse while we did errands, because she got in the habit of leaving things places and then we'd end up running everywhere trying to track things down. Well, a certain momma had a lapse in judgement and allowed Grace's favorite baby, aka Soft Baby, to come out for a shopping day.

After a very nutritious lunch at the food court, I realized Grace no longer had Soft Baby with her. We went back to all the stores we visited... twice. I talked to the manager's from the stores, but no one had seen her. Before we left the mall, I spoke with an employee from the Chanel counter - whom I know too well and see too frequently. She said she'd keep and eye out and check with her store before she left. (She ended up calling twice within the next few days to check-in to see how Grace was doing without her doll).

I called the mall stores and the mall office several times over the following days. Poor Grace was pretty lost without her Soft Baby. Who would she drag around the house with her?

Joel and I emailed back and forth - both of us were trying to find out who made the doll and if we could find a similar one on EBay. No luck and then Joel found her - she was made by Goldberger Doll Company out of Brooklyn, NY. He contacted the company and just this Tuesday, a representative called back and said they had one left at the factory. So, they shipped it overnight to us and last night, Grace got the surprise of her life.

She knows it's not the same baby. I think Joel told her the new baby is Soft Baby's sister or something. Grace seemed fine with that answer. So, Soft Baby's sister is named Heartie. I think because she has a heart on her? I don't know.

Major kudos to Goldberger - what great customer service. They've made our four-year old very happy and this momma feel a little less guilty.