Monday, October 25, 2010

The Strong with the Weak

Sunday's are hard.  I really miss Joel being with us on Sunday mornings at church.  I miss teaching Sunday School with him and seeing how much fun he has goofing around with our kids.  I miss us dropping Grace off at her Sunday School class together and I mostly miss us sitting next to each other during service and worshiping as a family. 

I wake up half-dreading going to church, because I know I'm just going to miss Joel.  Usually that missing-Joel-feeling turns into crying.  I've always been a church-crier.  Yes, I'm the one week after week with the tissues out.  The songs always get to me, the prayers get to me, watching the other families sit together gets to me.  And don't even get me started on baptisms.  I cry like a baby.

So, I know come 7 am on Sunday morning that I'm going to be a mess in just a few hours.  Yesterday, our Pastor took a few minutes to remind us of all the people in our congregation that are really struggling.  Every time he mentioned someone who had just lost a parent or whose cancer is getting worse, I felt like I was getting a punch in the gut.  There are so many people, good people, hurting.  These people are really struggling.  But week after week, we all come together - the strong with the week, and we worship.  I cried because my heart hurt for them.  Yes, this is a tough time for our family with Joel overseas.  But we're all relatively healthy and well.  I was so encouraged to be surrounded by a loving Church family - some are struggling, some are not.  But we all worship the same God and I know we're all praying for each other during the week.

Yes, Sunday's are hard - not just for me.  But I never leave wishing I didn't go to church that morning.  I always leave reminded of how great our God is, how much He has done for us and how loving His people are.  Next Sunday will be hard, I'm sure.  I can guarantee that I'll be asking my mom if she has any tissues in her purse.  But I can't wait to be with my church family again.

"I was glad when the Lord said to me 'Let us go to the house of the Lord!'" - Psalm 122:1


meg said...

Jill- Hope you dont mind that your Dad gave me the address.:) Your sharing really speaks to me. I havent felt that I could share openly in the past about my sinful self. I have learned much about being honest to God and others, letting people in, and letting Christ carry me in the past year or two. The thing is people don't always give you the ear and loving response you may need. But, that is where Christ will be when others fail. You have a friend here when you need one! I hear you!

meg said...

By the way, the above is Meagan Hindle:)

Jill said...

Meagan - Thanks so much, girl. That means so much to me! And you always have a friend in me when you need it!!!

Mowenackie said...

It IS hard to do anything alone that was previously a "together" routine. My husband and I did a lot of hiking together, so now I get the same feeling before a hike with friends. It makes me both happy and sad. And - this one is kind of silly - I hate going to the chiropractor now because we always used to go together!